I look back - Episode 11

In our country, when the government wants to do some reforms, they won’t do it all by themselves. They appoint some representatives to execute in behalf of them. Also these representatives won’t execute the reforms properly and they use the power given by the government, to their own benefits and some of their relatives, which will give frustration to many people. You may wonder why I am telling this. You will get to know in this write up.

In my school, later there was a rule put forward by our head mistress. The rule states that every student in our school should wash their Tiffin boxes after the lunch. Since school did not have enough staffs to check the students Tiffin boxes also it wouldn’t be fair for the management to tell the staffs to check the Tiffin boxes. So they appointed representatives from students to check everyone’s boxes after the lunch. Only after getting the OK from the rep, any student is allowed to enter the class after the lunch.

That day, G was eating her lunch as usual with her gang. I looked at her as she just finished eating. She washed her box and wiped it. She looked her face in the reflection created by the shining clean silvery Tiffin box of her. She did wash her face before that and combed her hair in to round bundle. She looked very beautiful. She walked towards the entrance and showed her box to the rep. Though the box was clean, the rep told her that it was unclean and told her to wash the box again. She was confused and she was not able to resist him and just for his satisfaction she washed the box once again. This time the box was ultimately clean. Again the same rep, he refused to allow her again. She was totally frustrated. She started to argue with the rep. But he was very stubborn in not allowing her. So she again washed and this time she went to show to another rep. But he also refused to allow her. After the fifth time they allowed her to go.

I could see the anger and frustration in her. I was not able to just stand there anymore. So I just went to the place where these reps are standing and thanked them. “Do this to her frequently, I want her to cry before me”, I said.
To be continued…

I Look Back - Episode 10

I am confused. I really didn’t expect this from you, she continued. Expect what? I thought. You proved that you are no different from other guys, she added. You helped me a lot in continuing my studies; you had been a good friend amongst other boys. But this is what you have in return for me, She continued. So here after there is no relationship between you and me, and I am ashamed being friend with you, she grunted before leaving the place. But even after she left I was thinking how she came to know this matter, I dint tell her yet. After a while my best friend came that way. I enquired him whether he said anything to G. He said no but he assured he told S. Finally I came to know how this news got spread. If you tell a girl a news and tell her not to tell any one, then at the end of the day every one will know the news. They call it a girl thing.

He requested my apology for telling this news to S. I did not see any mistake on his part. I am not in anger with him. But with G. how could she believe blindly whatever she hears about me. If she is truly in friendship with me she should have asked me about that for confirming. The act of her clearly shows that she is just like any other girl. Nothing special in her. But I am not going to leave this alone. I am going to teach her a good lesson. The cunning part of me, which gone to hiding because of her, now came back to me, that too because of her.

Every love starts with fight and ends with love, but in my case it started with love and now going to end with war, I said to my friend.

to be continued...

I Look Back - Episode 9

I nodded my head slowly as if I was accepting the offer with some hesitation, though my heart was jumping in joy. I looked at G and C, as they were standing together. I noticed a smile just leaked out of G’s face. She noticed that I am beholding her so I skipped my sight out of her. I got ready for rehearsal as teacher wanted me to stand in the centre. I was waiting for a big dance step, but she just told me to raise my hands and wave for some time. That was easy for me. And after that I was holding the girls’ hands and I came forward to the front of the stage as people before me standing or sitting in front of the stage clapped the hands. It was the annual I felt very happy getting applauds from the crowd.

After our show I just went to the changing room for shedding my costumes, where I saw G just standing before me and alone in the room. She was standing very near to me as I can smell her fragrance. As once my friend said usually it was not love at first sight, at first sniff it was. I was simply looking at her. My eyes forbade sending the signals to the brain but my nose did. She waved her hands before my face as if she’s saying bye to me, but wanted to get my attention. I got out of that hallucination after a while. What she asked. Nothing, I lied. She threw a smile at me and just left the room. At that I felt like holding her face in my hands. I think at some instant of this time she became a part of me. And at that instant I decided to tell her that how much I like her. I didn’t want to mention it as love, because I was not at an age to understand what love is. It was a feeling, which makes you think about one person most of the time.

One day I told all these things to one of my best friend. I believed in him. After telling this to him I felt very much relieved. That evening G came to me. I was little bit nervous. “I didn’t expect this from you”, she told.

To be continued…….

I Look back - Episode 8

Her name was C. I really wanted to be very close to her. But fortunately I didn’t get opportunities for that. Even I tried to make some, but didn’t work well. Every one in our class, attracted to her. She was very close to one of my big rival in my class and this made me hate her. There was a saying in Tamil “Nizhalil arumai veyilil theriyum” (you will realize the goodness of Shadow only when you are exposed to the sun). I really missed G those days. I wanted to continue the relationship with her.

Meanwhile annual day celebrations were announced in our school. Teacher asked for active participation in the cultural events from our class. Firstly she asked for skit, some people from my class opted for that. I didn’t opt for skit; actually I never wanted to participate in these events. There are two reasons for that. One is, if you are participating in the events, you need not to come to school that day. Secondly, I always wanted to sit back, relax and watch the performance.

Teacher asked for dance participation. For me dance is like eating bitter guard. But both G and C opted for dance participation and my rival P also opted for dance. The only thing went on my mind is what happen if they pair G or C with P. I can’t even imagine that. So with out even thinking again I raised my hand for Dance participation. On the next Saturday they arranged for dance practice in my headmistress house. I told my mom that I am going for dance practice. She looked at me strangely and asked dance? You? “Yes” I replied. When I went there I came to know that boys and girls are dancing separately. I scolded myself for my foolishness. They wanted us to dance for some song. After seeing my dance they removed from the group and made me wait. I was just watching others dancing, also sometimes peeping in to the room where girls danced. While I was peeping in to the girl’s room one teacher saw me and called me inside. I was frightened to the core. I thought she was going to beat me in front of all the girls that too G and C are there inside.

Teacher asked me why I am not dancing with the boys. I told her that no slot available for me, hiding the truth that I was expelled because of my poor dance. After thinking for a while she asked me, “Can you dance with these girls??”

To be continued……..

I look back - Episode 7

I had a feeling in my childhood days. I always imagine my cycle as a bike, since i admired bikes very much. I imagined some places as fuel stations and I my self imagined that my cycle had a transmission system and made manual transmissions. so practically after filling the fuel for my bicycle I started for G's house.

On my way to her house I saw green fields all over. The birds in the sky also accompanied me in my journey. The obvious bumps and pits in the road appeared to be easy for me. Only the thought of seeing her house filled my heart. I never drove my cycle this far. But it didn't make me tired. At that time even climbing a hill seems to be a easy job for me. I really thought the above said things would happen. But it didn't. I was tired after driving for a Km. So we stopped for a while. I was staring at the path which we have to take next. Suddenly a heavy blow landed on my back. I was shaken by the blow, the face reflected with both anger and pain. Even tears started flowing from my eyes. I turned to see who is that. It was my mom.

Since I was not there near my place for a while, My parents started for searching me. They inquired about my presence in all my friends place. Then suddenly they came to know that I was heading towards Railway station, that's where G's house is situated, my mom came that way in search of me. I was literally dragged by mom to my house. My parents did not allowed me to go out of our campus, then. Visiting her house seemed to be a mirage for me.

During weekends I and my friends never stayed in home. We always roam some where and play cricket to the core. That day we saw a new family arriving there. They came for the flat next to ours. We saw them moving the things from the van they came to the flat. There I saw a girl who's more beautiful and attractive than G.

To be continued....